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People affected by ADHD tend to put off what they should be doing and put their attention elsewhere. This can result in running out of time to get important things done. That is when it is time to triage. In the medical world triage is determining how to prioritize patient care. “The term comes from the French verb trier, meaning to separate, sort, shift or select.” (Wikipedia)

When we triage what we have to get done we are sorting through the tasks determining what is most important and urgent. Often because we have left things to the last minute and are running out of time, we have to select what is going to get done now and what can wait for later. These are often hard choices. We feel everything has to happen now. Unfortunately, that is often not possible so we are left to separate, sort, shift or select. We need to separate out the most crucial task and get it done first so that the patient doesn’t die.

Triage is a rapid process because the point is to determine which action to take first in order to best salvage the situation when you have a little time. Often this means making tough choices as to what gets done in time and what doesn’t. The key is to make the choice and then take immediate action. Not waste time fretting about your choices and what might not get done. That results in wasted energy. Energy that could be better used in taking action.

Next time you have too much to do and too little time, take a moment to triage. Separate the tasks out, sort them by importance and select what action to take first. Then take action.

Many people affected by ADHD struggle with getting to sleep at night. Often it is because we can’t quiet our brain down. In addition, many affected by ADHD are night owls so it is hard to ignore the energy that starts to surge late in the evening.

I believe ritual can help. Ritualizing your bedtime routine can start to send messages to your body that it is time for sleep. I use the word ritual because when I think of sleep I think of sacredness. Many of us with ADHD kind of fight sleep. This is unfortunate because lack of sleep exacerbates our symptomology.

Ritual can be soothing and soothing helps us get into sleep mode. Start by making a list of what you need to do to get ready for bed. How can you ritualize it? For example, maybe your ritual includes changing into your nightclothes first. Washing your face, brushing your teeth and whatever else you do while prepping for bed. It might include laying out your clothes for the next day. Maybe checking your calendar for the next day so you know what to expect.

Then do something sleep conducive. This could be reading awhile, journaling, meditating, stretching or whatever else relaxes you. But set a time limit so you are getting to bed around the same time each night.

If you need sound to go to sleep to turn on the radio or a podcast. Don’t leave the TV on because the TV is a visual medium. It needs to be something where you are not tempted to keep your eyes open for as long as possible. I find listening to podcasts that are engaging but not too engaging helps me. Meaning I am not tempted to stay awake listening. A great podcast for this is called “Sleep with Me.” It is definitely an acquired taste so try it more than once to see if it works for you. I also found podcasts that are re-broadcasts of old time radio shows can help me fall asleep. There are many podcasts that play old time westerns, mysteries, drama, etc.

Whatever you decide to do with your nighttime routine make sure you play with it until it is just right for you and helps ease you into sleep. Once you have figured that out think of the routine as a ritual you must perform every night. Try to start your nighttime ritual at roughly the same time each night so that your bedtime is at about the same time each night. You are training your body to sleep.

People with ADHD struggle to get things done in a timely fashion. Much of the struggle is to get started on the task and then stick with it until it is done. It is not that we can’t start things but that we often can’t start the right thing, that thing we are supposed get done. Instead we start many things that are not a priority to avoid the task that we need to do.

I have talked and written a lot about chunking projects into shorter tasks. It is easier to get started and do a shorter task than to get started on a big project. All big projects are a series of shorter tasks waiting to be accomplished.

I strongly believe that success breeds success. It makes sense to identify a short task to start with in the morning and complete quickly. That success may just spur you on to the next task. The only caution is not to get so full of the success that you feel you don’t need to accomplish anything further that day.

When I wrote my book “Forget Perfect: How to Succeed in Your Profession and Personal Life Even if You Have ADHD” I didn’t write the book from the beginning to end. I wrote it in chunks with each chapter a series of those chunks. That way I could write for a short time and complete something and cross if off the list. That success helped me pick another chunk to write and complete. Each chunk spurs me on to finish the next until a chapter was done. I didn’t write in a linear fashion but wrote what chunks I could when I could.

I often wrote first thing in the morning to get the allocated chunks for the day done. The success of completing a chunk done helped me keep going. That resulted in a more productive day.

At this time many people are working from home and it is difficult to get started in the morning and stay on task all day with so many distractions available at home. The strategy of picking a short task to get done at the start of the day will help you to get started in the morning. The immediate success will set the tone for the day encouraging you to get more short tasks done. All those short tasks become a completed project. You have achieved your goal.

Habits are hard to develop and sustain especially if you are affected by ADHD. As an ADHD coach I am asked all the time by my clients how they can create new habits and maintain them. They want the secret. Unfortunately, there is no one secret that makes habit formation easy.

What I have found most important about forming new habits is mindset, especially the mindset of forgiveness. Habits are hard to maintain so you need to forgive yourself when you mess up. Don’t give up but get back to working on that new habit as soon as possible. Often when we mess up, we give up and decide that we failed and can’t maintain the new habit.

Sticking to a new habit means you will mess up sometimes. Being resilient and trying again enables us to develop new habits. The best way I know of starting and maintaining a new habit is to link it up to a habit you already have. For example, probably brush your teeth every morning. It is a habit you already have. Let’s say the doctor gives you medicine to take in the morning and you keep forgetting to take it. Put the medicine where you keep your toothbrush or toothpaste. That way you will see the medicine every time you brush your teeth. You will be reminded that you also take the medicine in the morning. That is hooking a new habit to a habit you already have. It will help you to remember and maintain the new habit.

Think about the habits you already have. You weren’t born doing these habits, they were developed over time. The same will be true of the habits you create today. It will take time. Patience is required. But it is possible to build new habits even if you are affected by ADHD. It may mean writing notes to yourself to remind you until you don’t need the notes anymore. It may mean getting the help of family or friends to gently remind you that you are working toward creating a new habit. It may mean altering a habit you already have to include the new habit.

Just remember there is no great secret that everybody but you knows about starting and maintaining a new habit. This is hard for everyone.

As an ADHD coach I work from my home. I see most of my clients virtually or by phone. The few who come in person have transitioned to virtual during this pandemic. Many of my clients are struggling to work from home right now and I understand why. It is not ideal to work from home when you are affected by ADHD. Accountability and supervision are less when working from home, dangerous things for those affected by ADHD.  Here are tips for working at home during a pandemic. Please reach out to me if you need extra support.

Start at a regular time

Start working at a regular time each day. Being home tempts you to take care of non-work related activities before settling down to work. You could lose your whole day before you get started.

“Commute” to work

Do something to transition to work time. You used to have your commute to transition to work but now you don’t so maybe take a short walk before starting to work or do some stretches. Even a quick meditation. Determine a specific location for your work time within your home even if just means one end of the couch. When you sit there it is time to work. If you live with others, communicate that when you are in your work spot you are in work mode and should not be interrupted unless absolutely necessary.

“Commute” home by planning your next day at the end of your work day. This way you have a specific place to start in the morning. It will be easier to get to work and not waste time wondering where you should start. Decide what tasks need to happen and whom you need to talk to the next day. Make a plan.

Work in “sprints” throughout your work day

Don’t meander through your work day. Use your plan from the day before and execute. Break big tasks into smaller ones. Then “sprint” through the first task. Take a break. Before taking the break though, decide what your next “sprint” will be so that when it is time to get back to work you know where to start and are less likely to procrastinate. Set a timer for your breaks so they don’t take up all your day and you have to work into the night. Have a clear starting and quitting times so that you can anticipate when you are done for the day.

Stay in contact with others

You need to stay in contact with others, the people you work with during work time and colleagues, friends and families during break times and off-work times. If possible, use FaceTime, skype, google hangout, zoom or other technology to see who you are visiting with. Space your contact with others throughout your day.

Eat at regular intervals

Don’t graze all day while working. Take a lunch break and snack breaks as needed. Sit down and eat away from your work. Be sure to remain hydrated. Even throw in a little moving around before or after your lunch or snack to keep your energy up.

Get help when you need it

If you get stuck, contact someone and brainstorm. You would do that at work so there is no reason not to do it at home also. If need be get a coach or other professional to help you.

Stay away from “rabbit hole” distractions

During breaks be careful not to do things that will take you down a rabbit hole. One example might be tracking the news on twitter. Breaks are meant to be short and refreshing. If you must check social media , TV or radio during your breaks set an alarm so you don’t get sucked in and lose track of work time. You may have stay away from such things during the work day if you can’t control yourself.

Track your time

Keep track of what you are doing with your time. It can be a simple list but it helps to have a tangible record of what you have accomplished at the end of each day. I use my planner to write down at the end of the day and actually throughout the day what I am going to do the next day. Then I check it off as I complete the tasks. If I do a work-related task not on the list I add the task to the list afterwards. It helps me see progress or lack of progress. Also, you have an accounting of your time in case anyone asks.

Manage co-morbidities

Many people affected by ADHD also suffer from anxiety or depression or both. Keep an eye on that. This is an extremely stressful time and can exacerbate symptoms. Stay in touch with your mental health care provider.

Make no big decisions

Given the pandemic this is not the time to make big decisions like changing jobs or quitting medication. Lack of certainty in areas of our lives often makes us want to take control and make decisions where we can. That is reasonable but don’t make life-altering decisions during such fluid times. You can think and plan but don’t act until things have settled down.

I had to laugh when I saw the topic for this essay. At the end of each year I brainstorm topics that I will write about in the coming year. Then I make a list and assign dates as to when I will write on each topic. It helps me avoid struggling to come up with a topic when I need to out of the blue. It also helps with the avoidance of writing because I don’t have the excuse of not having an idea.

Aside from being an ADHD coach, I am affected by ADHD myself. Avoidance is something I struggle with everyday. I make excuses in my head as to why I am not doing what I should be doing at any particular time. Avoidance is a chronic issue for those affected by ADHD. I try to remind myself of that all the time. I am not a bad person or a lazy person, just someone who happens to struggle with getting lots of things done.

Avoidance is sneaky because we are often not aware that we are doing one task to avoid another task. We simply have a story telling ourselves that what we are doing needs to be done before or instead of what we should be doing. Here is the thing – it is a story. And not all stories are true. Often when I need to write something I find other things to do instead. I tell myself stories as to why those other things are more important to do. Sometimes they are but mostly it is just avoidance.

Knowing you are telling yourself a story can be helpful in breaking through the wall of avoidance. I try to ask myself “is this true or is this a story I am telling myself? What is the actual data of the situation telling me?” Data is key. For example, my newsletter comes out on Thursday so I have to make sure that my newsletter is written by Wednesday. That is data. What if I am busy all Wednesday. That is another piece of data.  What it means is I need to start writing on Tuesday. Come Tuesday I can think of a hundred other things I need to do and avoid starting the newsletter. Stories about how maybe I could fit it in on Wednesday or how I could get up really early on Thursday to write it. Or an even better story is that if I just wait I will want to do the task so it is better to wait until I feel ready to start.

Just stories.

Being affected by ADHD often causes us to struggle to get stuff done in a timely manner. Unfortunately there are no easy answers. If we remember that we often tell ourselves stories to avoid doing things we can sometimes stop the storytelling and look at the facts. Then take action.